FRIDAY UNSCRIPTED

To finish off this week I thought i would throw at you some mildly crude humor. If you don't think this is funny there is something seriously wrong with you. Enjoy and have a great weekend.

Make sure to come back on Monday as Roll turns 150.

A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner.

Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess.

The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they begged their dad for the clue.

Well, he said, 'It's what mommy calls me sometimes'.

The little girl screams to her brother,

"DON'T EAT IT, IT'S BUTTHOLE."

SELLING DRINKS 4 of 4

Last but not least is the final installment of the series. I am thinking OSU needs put this in their football hall of fame.

Roll mental camera...

The entire day leading up to one particular night game was really hot. So we headed to the stadium in our hot weather selling gear, shorts and a t-shirt. Little did we know a massive cold front was on its way down for a visit.

We thought it odd that people were showing up in short sleeves but carrying coats and blankets. But we just thought they were using them for cushions. We sold a ton of drinks that first half in the heat but like clockwork the cold front pushed in at half time and the temperature drop 40 degrees in 20 minutes.

Needless to say the cold drinks dried up. Man what I would have given to be a hot chocolate vendor that day.

Planning and forethought was not in my bag of tricks back then. The world was now at this moment and nowhere else. I had no time or wanting to look down the road. Sure I paid the price freezing my butt off under the stadium, but that was part of the fun. You just never knew what tomorrow, or the second half, would bring.

Don't worry Shelly this isn't a mid-life crisis post but sometimes you just need to forget about tomorrow and live in the now. Easier said than done.

Any takers?

SELLING DRINKS 3 of 4

Just 1 more day of selling drinks after this one, come on you can handle it

Roll mental camera...

To make the best money selling drinks you had to know how to cheat the system. You see you were given a huge stack of cups at the beginning of the game which you filled yourself and sold. At the end of the game the soda boss would come and count how many cups you had left. If there were 30 cups missing then you owed him $30, a dollar for every missing cup.

I have always been a quick study and quickly figured out how to minimize my payout. During the 4th quarter of the game I stopped selling drinks and focused on collecting cups that people had discarded. I could usually collect 15 or 20 cups by the time the boss man came around. But first I had to take them to the restroom and wash them out and dry them and return them to the stack of unused cups.

I am truly sorry to any OSU football attendees in 1990 that may have happened to buy a drink served in a used cup. Sure that cup may have been used for a spit cup or an ash tray but it was rinsed thoroughly. What you didn't know didn't hurt you (I hope). But hey I got to pocket alot more money thanks to your unknowing sacrifice.

I tried to apply that same reasoning to many thing in life, cutting corners or cheating the system. But it only succeeded in selling drinks. In any other real life experience where I have cut corners it has come back to bite me. So I learned pretty early on that paying your dues and doing it right the first time is always the best policy. My entire foundation in ethics based on used pastic cups, who would have thought.

Was there an instance in your life where you remember learning what ethics really means?

How about the time you learned to cheat the system?

Did it come back to bite you?

SELLING DRINKS 2 OF 4

back to selling drinks at the Oklahoma State football game many many moons ago, and I mean many.

Roll mental camera...

I order to make good money selling things to people in a stadium you have to scream stupid sayings like a New York carnie. I am not sure why, but it is carnie law so they say. No, I have no idea who "they" are.

So that explains why I never made good money. I couldn't bring myself to be creative in selling drinks. I heard guys yelling all kinds of stuff like, "Get your ice cold thirst quenching Coke here," or "Frosty cold Coke just waiting to please here."

Yes, you had to end every sales pitch with "here" just so they would know it was you talking and not the other guy with the cotton candy.

So my sales were directly relational to the weather. HOT lots of money, COLD not so much.

I am definitely guilty of not screaming "Get your one way ticket to heaven here," or "Got your good news and salvation here." If it is a hot crowd full of Christians I have no issues talking it up. But put me in a cold room of non believers and I get quiet in a hurry. I guess I think they will look at me like a New York carnie if I do pipe up.

Do you talk more openly about your faith to Christians than non?

Does the Jesus freak label scare you?

Does the guy saying "here" ever help you locate him?

SELLING DRINKS 1 OF 4

Shelly and I went to the Oklahoma State football game this weekend and it reminded of a few stories of when I was in school there.

Roll mental camera...

Some of my buddies and I used to work the OSU games selling drinks. You would think it was to get into the game for free. But sadly this was pre Boone Pickens so if you had a student ID back then you got in for free. So we did it for the money.

We didn't make much, but it was enough to buy what was important to us back then, pizza and beer. My liver thanks me every day that I outgrew that phase of my life quickly.

I wonder all the time how different my life would be today if I would have been living on the straight and narrow path back then. It is scary to think that I might not have met my wife. Would I have liked to have lived a much cleaner life back then? Sure I would have, but looking at what I have now I wouldn't change it. I have no regrets (well at least of the things I can actually remember doing)

How different is your life now compared to your early twenties?

Were you a "straight and narrow" or a "wild and crazy"?

If you would have taken the opposite path back then do you think you could be in the same place you are now?

FRIDAY UNSCRIPTED

I really hope this clip didn't originate in Oklahoma but I wouldn't be surprised if it did. There really is no video just audio, so make sure your volume is up. Enjoy

TEENAGERS

Shelly and I helped at Big Switch tonight because they were expecting and I think they had around 600 teenagers show up. All the angst and raging hormones was insane. But at least I didn't have to break up any fights.

I hope Connor stays 9 for the rest of his life. I don't think I am ready for a teenager. I am sure his mom would appreciate it to.

Ah to dream