Monday, August 18, 2008

THE EVACUATOR

For those of you with children this story will probably make you laugh and wish you had had me around when your kids were babies.

Roll mental camera…

My wife and I are the youngest in both of our families. So we were around a lot of babies before ours were born. I quickly got a name for myself around the families for my uncanny ability to induce the #2 in my nephews or niece.

Yep that is right I was known as Uncle Poop. No they didn’t really call me that but they should have. It wouldn’t matter if that baby had just gone poop 10 minutes ago or hadn’t gone in 2 days. If they put that baby in my hand it was pretty much a guarantee that they were going to go again.

That wouldn’t have been bad except that most of the time my powers were so great that I would induce a movement that I like to call “THE EVACUATOR”. I am sure most of you know what I am talking about... the poop that would explode out of every opening in the diaper... up the back and down the legs, leaving very little in the actual diaper. Boy those were fun times, fun times.

But the funny thing is I really hope that I can be Uncle Poop in my adult relationships. Of course I mean that in a figurative sense. I hope I can be the type of person that someone feels comfortable enough to unload all of their heartache on. I have people like that in my life and want to be there for others. So if you have some “stuff” you need to unload...

Do you have that go to person that you unload on?

Are you person people come to?

Do you have a knack of some sort with babies? (Hopefully much more enjoyable than mine)

I promise I will get away from the poop posts eventually

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I've got a few safe places in my life where I can unload. Can't imagine life without 'em!

Robin Meadows said...

I get pooped on a lot....guess I've had enough kids of my own that I'm used to it. ; )

That's what moms are for!! :)

deleise said...

The embarrassing thing is when you don't notice that you have been pooped on until someone gently points it out.

By the way, what was the verdict on the arm from Friday?

Anonymous said...

I have someone I unload on, but I try and keep things clean. Seeing I have children, you might think this sounds very weird but I experienced this just today ... babies and tots (not trotts) absolutely hate me! It's embarrassing and makes me really paranoid. On the up side ... no diapers to change, Uncle Poop.

Kim Heinecke said...

I don't mind being pooped on unless it's some kind of animal. Babies have innocent poop.

If Kid Three has another day like yesterday, we may need your Evacuator Skills...

See, there's a How-To video waiting to happen...

Anonymous said...

We need to talk if you really have this talent. So how long does it usually take? :)
Jess