ENDO

Its like riding a bike. One of those phrases that makes sense only to people who know how.

Roll mental camera...

I was 8 or 9 and was of course a master of the BMX bike. My dad bought one for me at an auction. It was a total wreck of a bike that had spokes on the front wheel and a cool mag like in the picture for the other. The frame had a cool urban paint job, or more commonly known as spray paint.

I was riding down a hill by my house with some friends. One of them said to me that you could stop the bike by sticking your foot on the back of the front tire. I just had to try it.

The result was the front tire stopped but the rest of the bike, including myself, continued to move forward. The bike lingo for that picture above is called an "endo".

So there I was vertical on my front wheel and having no idea what to do next. My balance didn't last but a second and I came crashing back to earth with a thud.

I often believed things that sounded good, right or logical. I paid the price for many of those times. I currently try to make sure I see past the glossy cover and dig into the actual truth. That has saved me a lot of backside if you know what I mean.

Do you check Snopes before you believe an email you read?

Guilty of believing whatever you read?

LIKE A WEED

Both of my boys have been growing like weeds. They are definitely in a growth spurt.

Roll mental camera...

Between April of my 7th grade year and September of my 8th grade year I had a massive growth spurt. I grew from 5'8" to 6'4" in 6 months. Yes it hurt like crazy and I have the stretch marks to prove it. I was like a shrinky dink in reverse.

I went from being an already pretty tall kid that was way pudgy to a fairly thin bean pole nearly overnight. I have since reclaimed my pudginess, for posterity sake of course.

Growing pains hurt for the body as well as the soul. I have been dealing with the growing pains of trying to be a better person. Trying to shed old habits and take on better ones is not easy for me. External change for me has never been a problem but internal is a whole other story.

Is your soul ready for some growing pains?

How do you deal with them?

Remember shrinky dinks? I guess you would put them in the freezer if you wanted them to grow

WILD TANGENT

Ever had one of those days where no matter what you do you can't seem to get to finish the task at hand?

Roll mental camera...

I am a junkie for OPEN. I download stuff for freedom farm and a bunch of other things I am involved in. But today I have been trying to download the WHY series for a friend of mine.

The computer on the other hand decides that it is just too full to take any more.

LOW DISK SPACE

So I stared searching and saw that my documents and settings folder was almost 60 gigs. That is absolutely huge and so I knew something was wrong. Problem is I know enough about computers just to be dangerous. So I called my brother-in-law who is the wizard of all things computery.

I thought I would go off on this wild tangent to possibly be of help to any others who may be dealing with a bulging hard drive. Try these three small applications.

They cleared out 37 gigs of crud out of my hard drive.

CCLEANER
ADVANCED DISK CLEANER
FOLDER SIZE

THE DRAGONFLY

So have I mention that my wife takes some great pictures before? If you click on the picture and look at the big version you can really appreciate more that just a nice picture.

Look at the the wings and how intricately they were designed. It is hard for me to image God as a massive all powerful being when I see such delicate perfection.

I envision Him sitting a work bench with his tools building the wings like an artist making a leaded glass window. Taking his time to make sure they are just right.

I know He could just snap his finger and create but I don't think He will mind if I think of him as a master craftsman just working in his shop.

FRIDAY UNSCRIPTED

I used to love to watch the "Carrol Burnett Show." I would like to say that it was because Carrol Burnett reminds me of my mom (which she does) but in truth it was because of Tim Conway. All of his crazy characters really cracked me up and still do. I found this video and I hope you like it as much as I do. Have a great weekend.

AWE

Do you remember that first time in your life that your heart skipped a beat and you couldn't breathe.

Roll mental camera...

I posted before on my first Roller coaster ride The Big Dipper. Climbing into the seat I though was an accomplishment all on its own. I was scared to death.

But when it started moving up the first hill and I heard the all familiar clack, clack, clack, a new emotion started to develop. We got to the top and and right as it started to whirl down the other side it hits.

AWE

I don't remember feeling it before that moment. Once you feel it it is hard not to want it again. I have had it many times since, accepting Christ, getting married and the birth of my sons just to name a few. Awe is one emotion I never really get tired of.

When was your last AWE moment?

Are you in need of another?

SHAG

I have the new age shag in my house now but it doesn’t compare to the 70s version I grew up on.

Roll mental camera…

The picture doesn’t quite do justice to the carpet that was in the house I grew up in. Ours was much shaggier. I always felt like I was entering a jungle when I came in the house. Secondly it looks way to clean.

I can still hear my parents scream as they stepped on one of my jacks or dozens of other small pointy toys that were hidden among the ever growing mounds of shag. I swear that carpet consumed things. It hid bits and pieces like an old man’s beard.

I always found myself lying around trying to find all the hidden treasurers that the carpet was keeping locked away. I felt like a monkey you see at the zoo cleaning the fur of another monkey. The carpet always had something new to give.

I look at this two ways. I am the shag that is full of junk and is in need of a good cleaning. Or… God is the shag full of endless treasure that awaits anyone who looks for it.

Depends on the day which way I see it.

Are you the shag or is God?

Do you hide the junk or search for the treasure?

Did anyone else have cool orange shag like me?

TAKE TWO

I thought I would one one of my first posts again because I am definitely needing the reminder...

Roll mental camera…

My buddies and I were sitting on our bikes one day. I was probably 8 or 9. When what to our wondering eyes should appear, but a dump truck full of dirt. It rolled down our street and deposited a huge mountain of dirt at the end of the block. You could feel the electricity in the air as we all looked at each other with that Evel Knievel spirit. The fact that it sat no more than 10 feet from an intersection with no stop signs could not dissuade us. The fact that it looked 10 feet tall and as steep as Everest couldn’t hold us back. Helmets… we don’t need no stinking helmets. We were determined to jump to glory.

Bike after bike rode up the mound and down the other side. I remember like it was yesterday, launching off of the top of that mound traveling at the speed of light and doing no less than 3 back flips before hitting the ground. In all reality you might have been able to see sunlight between my tires and dirt and that is about it. But there was never a reservation. Never any doubt or fear. BLIND FAITH…

The mound only lasted a few days before the dirt was moved but that feeling has always stuck with me. I want to have that blind faith back and not second guess it. I want to filter out my own logic and reason when faith is concerned. Not the other way around.

Do you have a story of when you had blind faith as a child?

How about as an adult? That is a much harder questions isn’t it.

How do we get it back?

ANNIVERSARY WEEKEND

Shelly and I got away this weekend and went to a nice bed and breakfast in Hot Springs, Arkansas. We went over to the Garvan Woodland Garden to get some great pictures. Shelly took a ton of great garden shots but I think this one is amazing. It was taken through the middle of a tower.

WHAT AN EYE SHE HAS

FRIDAY UNSCRIPTED

Some new Vavrinaisms have been uncovered so enjoy.

If you look like your passport photo, you probably need the vacation.

For ever action there is an equal and opposite government program.

Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it.

No husband has ever been shot doing the dishes.

Middle age is when the broadness of the mind and the narrowness of the waist change places.

EINSTEIN MEETS HOMER

Einstein meets Homer is the only thing I can say to introduce this post.

Roll mental camera…

We adopted our most recent dog Casey a few years ago. She is bi-polar in brains. This dog is smart enough to open the back door unless we dead bolt it. She is also dumb enough not to remember that if she runs through the back door at full speed onto slippery tile she is going to be able to stop or turn before slamming into the island in the kitchen.

This dog has run through that back door and slammed into our kitchen island no less than 100 times. I figured at some point with her massive door opening intelligence that she would get it. Then I remembered something…

I am a college graduate, successful business man, can solve a Rubik’s cube in under 2 minutes and do sudokus with a pen. BUT, I can never remember when to use the word “effect” or “affect”. I sure I have used the word effect or affect thousands of times but it still hasn’t sunk in.

Maybe Casey can affect my grammar, but I doubt it will have any effect. Yes I had to look it up to know that I used them correctly in that sentence.

Do you have some Einstein meets Homer moments?

Give me some examples of your genius and your “DOH”

MacGyver

To be able to make a thermo nuclear bomb with a used Kleenex, some chewing gum, a bit of fishing line and duct tape would be awesome. I loved MacGyver.

Roll mental camera…

I loved MacGyver when I was a kid, but in reality I was the anti-MacGyver. I was always taking things apart instead of putting them together. If I couldn’t see how it worked by looking at it, whatever it was, was in trouble. I could sometimes hold out for a few days while my brain tried to rationalize how it worked, but at some point it was coming apart.

I always tried to take it apart neatly so I could put it back together. More than not by the end, a hammer was being used and there was no hope of putting humpty back together again. Well that is unless MacGyver was there.

I think I have finally out grown that when it comes to my faith. I don’t have to see it to believe it. I don’t have to try and dissect it just for it to make sense.

Are you still trying to see it with your own eyes instead of just believing?

Is it time to stop being rational?

Can you handle not knowing how gismos and gadgets work? I still can’t

SIDE SPLITTING

Laugh, cackle, guffaw, chortle, giggle, snicker and snort. I am sure I did all of these last night.

Roll mental camera...

I rode out to Freedom Farm with one of the graduates who was returning for a visit. His name is Cody and he is an absolute riot. The entire hour and a half round trip was filled with his hysterical tirades on the most random topics ever created by man.

By the end of the night he acting out a scene for a Chinese restaurant. He was not only the waiter but the patrons and the cook. At one point he had the Chinese waiter singing a country song that sounded like Johnny Cash meets Jackie Chan. My cheeks are still sore from from smiling and laughing.

I liked the way Cody says it. "I love to laugh and laugh hard. I love to make people laugh and laugh hard. I didn't get to do that when I was messed up on drugs so I try to do it every chance I get now. It is good for the soul."

Can't say it much better than that. Laugh and laugh hard

SUN v SON

I used to really love the sun.

Roll mental camera…

I was a young teenager and spent a summer day out at our local water park. I was still bullet proof, as I have mentioned before, so I went without sunscreen. 8 hours in the sun put a kink in my armor.

By the time I got home my chest was bubbled and glowing red like a lava flow. I not only was in mucho pain I also had an allergic reaction to the sun. My chest felt like it was coated in itching powder. Scratching was totally out of the question.

I tried ice packs and sun burn sprays but nothing helped. By dark I was in the emergency room. They had to give me a huge shot Benadryl to stop the reaction. For the next week I looked like I spent time on the Ghostbusters set with all of the aloe my mother slimed me with.

Needless to say the sun was no longer my friend. It felt great while I was in it, but I wasn’t careful and it messed me up.

Even something as life giving as the sun can be destructive. There is only one Son I can immerse myself in forever and not get burned.

Have you spent too much doing something that felt good only to get messed up by it?

How bad have you paid the price for a wicked sun burn?

FRIDAY UNSCRIPTED

These are some of my favorite quotes from some of my favorite comedians. Have a great weekend

"I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out."
Rodney Dangerfield

"I was so ugly when I was born the doctor slapped my mother."
Henny Youngman

"I have a large seashell collection, which I keep scattered on beaches all over the world."
Steven Wright

"Sincerity is everything, if you can fake that you have it made."
George Burns

"A word to the wise ain't necessary, it is the stupid ones who need all the advice."
Bill Cosby

"Always do whatever is next." and "Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things."
George Carlin

"Insomnia is my greatest inspiration."
John Stewart

"I like to drink my biscuits"
Perry Noble

MUST HAVE BEEN HOT

I was messing around on Biblegateway.com doing some research for a post I was wanting to write and had never really noticed how violent the old testament is. I searched the word "struck" and it came back with 142 hits, almost all of which were in the old testament. Either God was doing the striking or He was commanding the strike, and the people were walking away with a black eye because the were no longer walking.

I think the theme song for the old testament should be "Another one bites the dust" by Queen.

Man I am glad I live in the A.D.

The world prior to Jesus must have been hot, if you know what I mean.

HEAT WAS ON

Like I said yesterday the heat makes great fodder, but this time it wasn’t the summer causing the heat.

Roll mental camera…

When I was younger I had a fascination for fire. I posted about it before in “Where there is smoke”.

Some buddies and I used to make a little fire in a tall grassy field between 2 houses across the street. We would melt chocolate in a little pan and fondue anything we could get our hands on. Boys never go for strawberries.

We did dunk butterflies, crickets, worms, rolly pollies and the occasional june bug. By the middle of the summer we had a menagerie of chocolate critters in our collection.

But one dry day I knocked over the pot and the grass caught fire. That small fire turned huge in a matter of seconds.

We ran like crazy to the house and called the fire department (anonymously of course). I was so scared when the fire department showed up my mom knew I was guilty by just looking at me. They just barely saved the houses but I just knew I was going to jail. Thank goodness caller ID had not been invented yet.

That has always reminded me how even very small things can get out of control quickly. So I tend to let God be my fire department now days and help me put it out before it rages.

Do you have any small fires burning?

Do you need to call the fire department on a big one?

Have you ever seen a chocolate covered worm?

HEAT IS ON

Summer heat in Oklahoma makes for great story fodder.

Roll mental camera…

We had another double header in baseball last night and it was hot. It has been dry so the dust from the field was terrible. It felt like a dirty sauna out there.

I was enjoying feeling sweat trickle down my back as I coached 3^rd base. The dirt was getting in my shoes and sticking to my sweaty feet. I so enjoy grit between my toes. My eyes were burning from the constant sand blasting. And there is nothing like blowing your nose and the result is mud pies. I know the mental imagery is outstanding.

As an old friend of mine would have so eloquently put it “I was sweating like a lady of the night in church.” Of course in his version he used just one colorful word to describe the lady.

But I often find myself feeling like that lady. I too easily forget about God’s grace and let the things I have done or have left undone interfere with my relationship with Him. Just have to keep reminding myself that He is like the cool shower I took after the game. All I have to do is get in.

Do you find yourself uncomfortably gritty?

Do you forget about the shower He always has waiting?

A side note: Shelly thanks you all for the nice words about her photos

PICTURE POST

Shelly has been out burning up memory cards so I thought I would brag on her a bit more. Here are some animals she took on some of our more recent day trips I talked about last week. She has a bunch of new pics on her website so go check them out if you haven't visited it in a while. The link is over on the right. We are always looking for good titles for the pictures so please add a comment.

SHEL

I call my lovely wife Shel but that is not the Shel I am talking about. WHERE THE SIDEWALK ENDS by SHEL SILVERSTEIN is one of my favorite books to read with my boys. My mother used to read it to me and with the same copy from 1974 I do the same.

Since I am going to be lazy over the 4th weekend and not post on Friday I thought I would leave you with one of my favorite poems from the book. If you haven't read these poems to your kids, you should before they get to old to think they are fun.

RECIPE FOR A HIPPOPOTAMUS SANDWICH

A hippo sandwich is easy to make.
All you do is simply take
One slice of bread,
One piece of cake,
Some mayonnaise,
One onion ring,
One hippopotamus,
one piece of string,
A dash of pepper-
That ought to do it.
And now comes the problem...
Biting into it!

Have a great weekend

EASY STUFF

For those of you oldest enough to remember Johnny Carson's "Carnac the Magnificent" it would go something like this. "And the answer to this question is 5 and a half hours."The question was "How long can you stretch a 30 minute task?"

Roll mental camera...

My new TV came today. I had predicted that the switch out would take 30 minutes at the very most.

Nothing went as planned. The mounting bracket didn't fit the new TV. The wiring is all different and in different places. I had to use a saw?!?!

It was like starting from scratch, and that would have probably been easier. But there was no way I was going to sleep before I finished. I even had time to blog about it.

We went nearly 3 months without a working TV in the living room and I am glad to have it back so the boys and I can cuddle up and watch animal planet without having to go to a bedroom.

I hope I would be as steadfast with something spiritual if what started out as 30 minutes stretched to 5 hours. But believe it or not I didn't use any real of fake cuss words the entire time. In that I am happy.

Are you a stick with it until it is done kind of person?

THE ONE TRUE VOICE

It is not often I learn a life lesson from baseball but tonight I did.

Roll mental camera…

I am the third base coach for our team and I had a runner at third. I told him to listen to my voice and my voice only. If I tell you to run the run your heart out, if I tell you to stay put then stay put.

Now we are assuming for the rest of the story that the 9 year old boy I was talking to was actually listening and understanding what I was telling him. His brain could also have been in Tahiti.

The pitcher throws in the dirt but the catcher keeps it if front of him. The entire crowd thought that the ball had gotten by the catcher and started yelling at the runner to run.
I on the other hand was yelling at him to stay put.

He looked like a rubber gumby doll trying to decide to run or not. The crowd finally won him over and he ran and got tagged out at the plate.

The voice of the crowd can be overwhelming and can drown out the only voice that is important. I feel like a gumby myself sometimes.

Do you have trouble hearing your Head Coach through the crowd?

Last blog fast for the next 24 so see you then…